By Drew Dietsch
| Published
Hulk Hogan (real name Terry Bollea) has died at the age of 71. Hogan was best known as the face of professional wrestling in the 1980s thanks to being the golden boy for the World Wrestling Federation, the predominant American pro wrestling company headed by Vince McMahon, someone who you should probably have an opinion on if you have any moral compass whatsoever.
Over the following decades, Hulk Hogan would continue to be a prominent presence in the world of professional wrestling, including a momentous stint in World Championship Wrestling as one of the founding members of the New World Order stable.
Hogan’s persona and interpretation of a professional wrestler character would end up as the definitive poster child for the art of professional wrestling, carving out a stereotype that has continued to persist in the minds of so many people who have never even watched professional wrestling.
So I’m glad Hulk Hogan is dead because it’s time to bury that perception.
Hulk Hogan Was The Dumbest Kind Of Entertainment
Let me make something clear: Hulk Hogan was a successful entertainer. There is no question that he was able to channel the emotions of a crowd in the unique way that only pro wrestling can do. If there is a single nice thing I can say about Terry Bollea, it’s that he could do his job when given every advantage possible from his employers and screwing over other talented wrestlers in the back.
But here’s the thing: Hulk Hogan was never putting forth the best that pro wrestling can offer. He was a simple performer that found a formula and did everything he could to milk it. He was never as creative or technically sound in the ring as peers like “Macho Man” Randy Savage or Jake “The Snake” Roberts. His character and charisma never felt as earnest or fleshed out like Ric Flair or Sting. Hulk Hogan was always aiming for the lowest common denominator and finding that mark over and over again.
You don’t even need to stay in the world of pro wrestling for evidence of the low effort, low quality art Hulk Hogan put out into the world.
The Worst Star Of All Time
Any time Hulk Hogan tried to expand his celebrity profile outside of wrestling, we’d get star vehicles that crashed, exploded, and caused a pileup on the highway with multiple casualties. I don’t trust the taste of anyone who sincerely goes to bat for No Holds Barred, Suburban Commando, Santa with Muscles, 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain, or any of Thunder in Paradise. These are all middling-to-terrible projects made demonstrably worse by Terry Bollea’s anti-thespian abilities.
Hogan did have a few worthwhile appearances in movies when he wasn’t hogging the spotlight. His film debut in Rocky III painting him as a pretty boy lunkhead is pretty on point. His best deployment was easily in Gremlins 2: The New Batch as a righteously angry version of himself. Other than that, there is nothing Hogan did in the world of film and television to prove he had any legitimate talent as an actor.
Still, it’s not his attempts at cinema that will linger after his death. It’s the stink he left on pro wrestling that we have to wrap up on.
Hulk Hogan Is Not Pro Wrestling Today
Even when I was younger and first interested in professional wrestling, I never liked Hulk Hogan. Not only because he looked like a hot dog someone left out on the highway, but his whole schtick of braindead, flag-waving American nationalism never spoke to me. It spoke even less to me as Hogan made his garbage political beliefs and affiliations impossible to ignore as his social relevancy began to dwindle.
Looking back, Hulk Hogan’s brand of pro wrestling doesn’t just look antiquated, it’s practically neanderthal in both presentation and spirit. It’s an empty calorie meal of toxic machismo not fit for the pig trough.
Today, outside of the purview of the still Hoganesque WWE, pro wrestling is thriving in its diversity of performers, stories, in-ring ability, and stronger morality. These elements were always there but were shouted down or out by Hulk Hogan and others of his ilk in the industry.
In many ways, Hulk Hogan never cared about the art of pro wrestling. He only ever cared about what pro wrestling could do for Hulk Hogan. As such, it meant that he needed to continually reaffirm the idea of “Hulk Hogan IS pro wrestling” every time he stepped on the stage. That formed a picture of pro wrestling in many peoples’ heads that wasn’t actually an accurate representation of the art form’s wide and wondrous potential.
And now that he’s headed for the fertilizer factory, we can finally unchain the albatross of Hulk Hogan from around pro wrestling’s neck. He was never the real optimum ambassador for pro wrestling, you just thought he was because he’s the one they kept shoving in your face and down your throat.
I came to bury Hulk Hogan, but his body of work and the legacy he leaves as Terry Bollea will do that a lot better than I ever could.
